OK, so my new favorite soap is Kiss My Face olive oil based soap. It is the most wonderful thing if you are like me and would rather not have overpoweringly scented products. Ever since I started making my own cleaning products, I've decided it's kind of nice when something smells like nothing at all. So, of course I wondered whether I could use pure olive oil on my skin instead of moisturizing lotion.
"Of course," said The Google.
Jeri Hall famously rubbed her pregnancy belly with olive oil to avoid stretch marks, remember? All sources agreed that a couple of spoonfuls in my bathwater would soften my skin to the nth degree. I got my olive oil and ran the bath water, carefully adding the "couple of tablespoons" to the running water.
The events that followed can best be described as a public service.
It's one of those "I tried it, so you don't have to" moments.
Do as I say not as I regretfully did.
The first sensation is the smell. It was so olive-oily that it attracted the dogs. They obviously thought I was cooking up a big tub of mama soup. Seriously, a couple of carrots, some celery, etc. would not have seemed out of place. I kept having to shoo them away throughout the entire (horrible) process.
Step One: I slid into the tub.
LITERALLY.
Apparently "a couple of tablespoons" is waaaay too much oil. I made a mental note to try this again only with much less oil. (Which I did by the way, and the results were similar enough that it's not worth discussing separately.)
I remember taking baths at grandma's house when I was little. Always there was a capful of Avon's "Skin So Soft" added to the water. One reason for this, grandma explained, was to eliminate the potential for a grimy bathtub ring once you let the water out. That did hold true with the "Skin So Soft", but what about with the olive oil, you ask?
Oh my.
The ring that was left around the tub was utterly disgusting. Was I that dirty? Of course not. What was supposed to be a relaxing, skin softening and soothing activity became a slippery, dog shoving, gross gooey mess. When I finally did make it back out of the tub and dried off, my skin did feel nice and soft, if a bit smelly. I am not the biggest fan of olive oil, but a friend suggested that perhaps I've never had really good quality olive oil--that could very well be true.
Anyhoo--I looked over at the tub in shock at the remains. I think maybe I also shaved my legs while I was in there, so you can just imagine my horror. If you have an enemy, a good way to get back at them would be to break into their house and bathe in their tub with a lot of olive oil and leave it.
I have blocked out most of the details of the cleanup but I know that I was scrubbing the tub for over half an hour just getting the goo out. So gross. And, yes, as I mentioned earlier I did try it again. Sometimes I just don't learn the first time. I'm just not that bright, I guess. I kept thinking I just did something wrong. Nope. It was just the same regardless of how much oil was used.
Here's me--sticking to showers from now on.
No comments:
Post a Comment